Dress for Success

Affluence is only thread deep; at the End of Days, no one lies dying thinking about the $43,000 Brioni suit they never got around to buying. C’est la vie, James Bond would have worn it better anyway.

A week ago, 36.6 million viewers united in superficial and judgmental bliss.

That’s a lot of pressure.

A month of preparations and you could still end up on the worst dressed list.

Thankfully, everyday people like us don’t have to dress under the weight of such vanity. We’re happy to be wearing a pair of stockings with no runs or a tie with no stains (or be doing so under the radar). In fact, some of us will even pay our organizations money to not have to dress to impress ($2 jean days anyone?). And for those of us who don’t have such a system in place, we’re willing to give up a little extra for comfort and convenience – maybe more if it’s deceptively professional:

Dress Pants Sweatpants – Betabrand

You could conceptually, and maybe ideally, wear these to bed and save yourself the hassle of putting on pants in the morning. Very likely worth the $100 when you calculate out cost-per-wear.


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Suit Onesie – The Suitsy

For those of us who prefer to streamline our morning dress routine, or, as the Suitsy creator so elegantly stated, “[look] professional but [feel] like you’re in pajamas.” Plus, you won’t have to worry about your shirt untucking. However, this design may fail you if your date gets cold, and your blazer is literally stuck to your shirt.


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The Pivot Sleeve – Outlier

If your button-up is holding you back from comfortably crossing your arms or reaching across the counter for that coffee stirrer, then $125 should be a no-brainer investment. The seams of this shirt, along with the rest of Outlier’s clothing, is engineered so that customers “feel the intelligence, not see it.”

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Studies have shown that how we dress can affect how we work, and ultimately, how successful we are. Much of this is how we perceive the symbolic meaning of our clothes and how it relates and fits in to society. So if $100 sweatpants and onesies make you to feel powerful, then you drop that bill and climb that corporate ladder! You’ll be doing so in comfort and with ease. Interestingly enough, the only strategically engineered fashion items we could find are geared towards men. Apparently, women are content with less-pliable fabrics and outfits containing more than one piece. Either that, or there’s a market waiting to be conquered.

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